HVH3 #70 Hash Trash "Where'd the trail go?"
(The Hash Previously known as HVH3 #63)


Amherst, Mass.
Hared by Hand Job?
Sunday, May 11, 2003, 1300HRS
SP: Parking Lot of Rafters Sports Bar.

HVH3 present for the Hash: Comes On Vacation, Cainus Lickus,
At Your Cervix, Cajonas, Madame Flutterby,
Throbbing Member, Anti - Cock

HVH3 Wanker who was backsliding but who got caught on trail:
Mother's Little Douche Bag.

Visitors: BH3, Hare Club for Queers. Hartford H3, Follow My Tits

Hash Virgin: Just Herb - from Ellington.

SP was changed from 1400HRS to 1300HRs, just to confuse visitors. It worked and Hare Club joined us as a latecummer, sortof, more on that later...

I drove in from Florence and was a little early and unexpectedly ran into the Hare as she was presetting trail near the Maze on the U-Mass campus. She ambushed me and decorated my vehicle with an unknown white powder.

Anyway, the assembled Hashers circled up behind Rafters and pre-lubed with many many brewskis and hard cider. We were joined by the Virgin Herb, who took to hashing like a duck to water. He was coaxed, or should I say, made to cum by Cervix who enticed him to the Hash via a chat room.

The Hare explained her marks and the pack was off by about 1345 HRS. Just before we left the SP, I think I heard the Hare say something about having used only one stick of chalk and half a bag of flour. Little did I or the pack realize the implications of that statement till later.

As we left the parking lot, it rather quickly became apparent that the hash marks were few and far between. Half of the hounds went west along Amity Street while the other half went east. Cajonas spied trail in the parking lot of the old Louis' Supermarket. Meanwhile at that same moment, Comes On Vacation nabbed a backsliding Mother's Little Douche Bag as he tried to enter a store in that strip mall. I accosted him and wrote On-On on the backsliding part of his shorts and he was coaxed into joining us for the trail. He was AWOL by the next check!

Trail then went up and east on Amity then into the sidestreets of a condo complex. Trail here was hard to follow. Somehow we found trail again on Amity then it crossed over onto Lincoln St. ( I think it was Lincoln St) Trail ran south and we went as far as a right turning arrow into some woods behind a dog kennel. We lost trail there. We went back to the street and ran south to Route 9, but could not find trail. Throbbing Member, the Virgin, Cervix, and Cajonas somehow found a hash mark down a trail into a construction site. The hash marks led this a way and that away further confusing the pack. Some went into a parking lot of a Nursing home while FMT and myself shortcutted and found hash along a pond. As we exited the pond area we came close to the SP and saw Hare Club walking around the parking lot of Rafters. At this point, Comes On Vacation joined us back at Rafters because she too had lost trail. We tried to back track the trail from the SP but could not find more than a couple of hash marks. Comes On Vacation and I decided that the best strategy would be to go into Rafters and start DRINKIN', so we Did, and it was GOOD! FMT and Hare Club went south on University Drive and apparently found the rest of the Wankers at a Hoboes Camp behind the CVS and Post Office on University Drive. It must have been there that the rest of the pack lost trail and decided to go back to Rafters and start drinking. The re-united pack commenced drinking BBC Kolsch by the pitcher and consuming Hot Wings. We were soon joined by the Hare who got lonely at the Beer Check.

We had a few pitchers and plate of wings then went out to the parking lot for a closing circle. I'm very happy to report the return of the Happy Valley hashshit by Flutterby. It was a close vote as to who to award it to, between Hand Job and Flutter, but because he had kidnapped it before he went to that sandy place with no beach, we decided he should get it. The Hare was made to do some down downs, which she did like a trooper and the virgin was duly christened. BTW, Just Herb likes sheep as his favorite barnyard animal (lookout Cream Whora, competition!), and for the benefit of our Brethren Hashers to the East, you'll be pleased to know that Virgin Herb knew that the Square Root of 69 was "Ate Something". He also made mention of something having to do with a "Lonely Abortion", Hmmmm? Sounds kindof Catchy doesn't it?????

Anywho, trail was rated as "Ambitious", "5.9" and other sordid comments were made.I'm sure I'm forgetting something or other but the Genny Cream Ale was flowing quite well, especially on top of all the Kolsch.

We will now be switching over to Thursday nights.
I'm not sure when that is , Cainus, refresh my memory.

Anti-Cock
HVH3 Scribe.

PS, next hash might be changed from a Thursday night to Sat June 14, or Sunday June 15. Flutterby to Hare. Probably at his abode in Granby

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