HVH3 Number 122
Hares: Just Hossein (with some minimal co-haring by Anti-Cock)
[ Hossein's Virgin Lay]

Place: Start - Chez Hossein, Pulpit Hill Road, Amherst, Mass.
General AO of hash: In and around Puffers Pond environs.
Start Time 1800HRs - 7 JUL 05 (Thursday)

Hashers present for muster:
HVH3: Just Donna, Hand Job?, Colonel Mustard, Comes On Vacation, Cainus Lickus.

Visitor:
Honey Suckle Devine - Hartford H3 nee Dirt Road H3

Virgins:
Just Tyler - Audobon, N.J.
Just Amy - Amherst, Ma
Just Steve - Greenfield, Ma.

Latecummers:
Just Lisa
Just Newt
Dewey Do Me!

Trail started at Just Hossein's chateau on Pulpit Hill Road. Honey Suckle Devine was the first hasher present and he, in a very friendly manner, strolled into Hossein's kitchen and introduced himself to one of Hossein's housemates. "Honeysuckle Devine and I damn glad to meet you! Where's the beeer?" To which Hossein's housemate was speechless as no one had told him about a hash or hashers....

The pack assembled relatively quickly and darn near the annointed hour. Introductions were made and the virgins were given a chalk talk.

The trail started at the end of the driveway with a check which caused the FRBs to wander aimlessly around awhile searching in all directions for true trail. Cainus Lickus spotted true trail right off the bat, but within a few steps found another check. He followed a false with most of the pack choosing to follow him into some deep dark woods. Delighted to hear some grousing early in the hash the hares waited at the check for the returning pack.

True trail proceeded up Pulpit Hill Road to a false beer check! The hares planted a box of Bud Light about fifteen feet off the trail across some rusty barbed wire. Inside the box was a YBF!
( I thought it was funny - AC )

Trail then went to a check with true trail going thru a thicket of briars and poison ivy and down into a gravel pit / town road crew yard. There were some checks with sort of long falses in there and then trail went up and down some huge piles of gravel and wood shavings before it went up and down some steeep slippery embankments. Trail then crossed over some ass fault to beer check no.1 on the stream above Puffers Pond.

After some time kavetching about shtupping and beerys and such asstrophysical subjects, which normally accompanies beer checks, pack was off in search of beer check no. 2.

Trail went slightly uphill to a "whichyway" with almost the entire pack zenning the correct direction except for Hand Job? who proceeded down a long false. Her comment? " You Bastards!!!!"

Trail recrossed the assfault and then went around the backside of Puffers Pond and eventually down below the waterfall below the dam to beercheck number two.

Trail then zigged and zagged thru that trail network behind the Mill River Park and eventually down to the Harp ( Mike's Westview for you old time HVH3'ers)
There we met all of the latecummers and we caravaned back to Hosseins for the Down Down circle.

At The Circle:

The Hares, Just Hossein nad Anti-Cock were sung the ShittyTrail song and then did a Busby Berkeley'esque down down of Genny Cream Ale. Trail was given various ratings but averaged out to a .69 - what more could you ask for?????

Next up were backsliders Just Lisa II, and Just Newt, they were "Publically Pissed On"

Then the virgins: Just Steve's favorite Barnyard animal is sheep, hmmmm we think he'd like a Wendell hash... he guessed that the square root of 69 was 9 1/2. Just Hossein was a proxy for Just Amy who had to leave to go learn how to drive a Amherst FD hook and ladder truck. We sang "Here's to the Virgins They're true blue"

Then it was a big gaggle of the FRB - Cainus, FBI - Just Donna, DFL - Proxy for Col. Mustard, HJ?, Fashion on Trail - Hand Job?, Technology on trail - Anti-Cock, New shoes - Just Steve, changing clothes before circle AGAIN - Honey Suckle Devine, Blood on trail - Just Donna.
All doing down downs and singing, " Us, Phuck Us..."

Next Ignomius ceremony was the transfer of the hashit. Yes the HVH3 hashit actually returned from exile and was carried thoughout the trail. Nominations were Cainus Lickus for overachievbling again as the FRB and AC for exiling the hashit for so long. It was close butthe eyes were bribed to vote for Cainus. The transfer was begun by a ritualistic cleansing of the vessel down down by AC and a acceptance down down by CL. ( caught on film)

Hash Announcements: Burlington Invihashional in a coupla weeks.
DC Red Dress is limited to 500 people this year so register early and often.

Next HVH3 Hash will be July 21 hared by Cainus Lickus at the Cadwell State Forest in Pelham.

August 4th will be a COV trail.

The next HVH3 trail after that would normally be a thursday nighter, August 18th BUT will actually be a saturday August 20th hash by AC.

Finally, circle was ended with religion and the On In was down at the Harp.
BTW, the Radd Suxx were rained out after six innings and lost 3-1 to the Orioles.

Respectfully Submitted,
AC
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